JANUARY 24
What is as clear to me as the sun at noonday is not so clear to everyone.
Works, xiii. 289
I went to America to convert the Indians; but, O! who shall convert me? who, what is he that will deliver me from this evil heart of unbelief? I have a fair summer religion. I can talk well; nay, and believe myself, while no danger is near: but let death look me in the face, and my spirit is troubled.
It is now two years and almost four months since I left my native country, in order to teach the Georgian Indians the nature of Christianity; but what have I learned myself in the meantime? Why, (what I the least of all suspected), that I who went to America to convert others, was never myself converted to God.* I am not mad, though I thus speak; but I speak the words of truth and soberness.
Journal, 24th – 29th January, 1738
* – Wesley’s own note on this point reads, ‘I am not sure of this.’
